Turd is a fast-moving, business-minded, no-nonsense go-getter. She is able to organize the HERD Car Wash by the very next weekend. She rises early on Saturday and drives herself to the site of the car wash: a dead-end strip of road that is owned by Heartland Church. Turd brings a bucket, finds an outside water source, and dispenses water bottle washers to her league-mates.
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